22: How Have I Changed In the Past 2 Years?
I'm finally going to do one with a little more substance. Are you ready?
22: How Have I Changed In the Past 2 Years?
Now I have to try to flip the clock in my head back 2 years...
I'm first going to state the main events that have occurred, then I'll describe how each one has affected me.
I went to my last winter retreat as a student
This was kind of like the beginning of the end for me. The end to my time as a student at church. It was a great year filled with laughs, a powerful message and building things out of driftwood with the guys. But leaving the camp was super hard that year, knowing if I were to return it would no longer be as a student.
Took a tour of the college I would soon choose to attend
I didn't want to go to 'The Ville' at first. "It's a teacher school." I told my mom. But she convinced me to just take a tour to see if I liked it. Being stubborn it took some talking to get me to agree but I finally said yes and went to take the tour. I loved the campus and basically fell in love with it. I also learned an important lesson about things not always being what they seem. Even though it is still largely a 'teacher school' my college has a very underrated art program which I am happy to be a part of.
Took my last Art class with Mr. Huck
Art Concentration. This was the class that any sensible artist at my high school wanted to be asked into. And I got in both junior and senior year. During senior year my art concentration class became like a little family. Our teacher, Mr. Huck, was my favorite teacher in high school. He pushed me to be a better artist in my four years and encouraged me.
My last year in Mpact definitely was the year that made me consider becoming an Mpact leader.
Ok, so this one actually makes me laugh. I'm just glad that my 'first date nerves' are out of the way so now I just have to worry about the 'first date with a guy i'd actually want a relationship with nerves'.
I went to Prom solo, which let's be honest, is the best way to do it. It was a gradual boost in my confidence for some reason, along with independence.
The first step to 'real life'.
Selena Turned 1
My cat turned 1. I know this doesn't seem like a big deal to some people. But, in the past most of my cats have been outdoor cats and that usually meant they either disappeared or made friends with the road out front. This was the first cat since my cat Mikey (who disappeared right after his 1st birthday) to turn 1. (She's 2 now.)
Independence, sharing, confidence, self-discipline. A lot of things were impressed upon me during my time in college so far. I remember after a few months realizing how many more guy friends I had in college vs. high school. Confidence has always been a shaky subject for me. However in college I finally had to learn that if you want to be friends with someone YOU have to make it happen. I came out of my shell more than ever.
Navs gave me a home away from home, they are like a little family for me. I learned a lot about my faith in having to be away from home and Navs was helpful in helping me keep the foundation of my faith strong.
ZEN as I like to call her, or baby Zoey, is my cousin's daughter. She's the closest thing I have to a niece or nephew and she's simply adorable.
The Passion Conference (which took place in Atlanta Georgia and also marked the longest distance I've traveled without my parents) was astonishing. It was an experience I don't expect to ever forget. The one stand out moment was one morning standing in the Georgia Dome worshiping along with 60,000 other people and thinking "There are so many more believers out there worshiping along with us. And so many more in the past and future... imagine all of us being together some day in heaven worshiping God together." It was an overwhelming thought. I often refer back to that moment when I worship today.
My internship is one of my favorite things right now. It's taught me how to work come together as a team to create something that truly will influence people.
Started liking someone new
You can read about this particular change in the second half of my post called What Kind of Person Attracts Me.
Became an Mpact leader
Becoming an Mpact leader has brought out my responsible side. ;) Bet cha thought I didn't have one huh.
Said "farewell" to my best friend
Honestly is was more like a "whatever" and I just didn't respond to her text. I don't want to speak ill of her since I still do care about her dearly, so I won't give you many details. Basically I finally came to the realization that our relationship didn't resemble a two way street very well. We both had grown apart a bit and literal distance didn't help things much. I am still disappointed in how we let it end though, and I hope one day we can at least have closure in the form of actual face-to-face interaction. Since then, however I have seen what healthy friendships look like and have continued to grow closer to the people around me.
Sister got engaged
My bigger sis got engaged! So far it's been filled with excitement, but I know I am going to have to have that 'realization moment' at the wedding when she walks down the aisle and bawl. Tears of joy of course, but also because of remembering the good old days of childhood are behind us.
This blog. Through it I have been able to express myself a little differently. There's still a wall I have put up but with this medium it's a little easier to pull some of the bricks down.
Overall the quality I would say has changed the most in me over the past two years is the improvement in my self-confidence.
So, in closing, thank you to all of you who have been my support group and my inspiration. I am truly blessed to have friends and family like you.